Thank you for that fine introduction, Vice-Czar Bing Bong, and I thank all of you esteemed Cycle365-ers and citizens of the world for that warm welcome. I also want to thank you all for electing me to be your Czar of the Monthly Challenge. I am definitely excited to begin serving you in that capacity on July 1st. I humbly promise to do the best job I possibly can, to be honorable, and to resist issuing nearly-impossible challenges. I hope I don’t let you down as it would be terribly embarrassing to go down in Cycle365 history as the only Monthly Challenge Czar ever to be impeached.
At this time I’d like to give credit to my predecessors, Scooter and Old Grumbleface, for their many months of dedicated service to the Monthly Challenge. I’d also like to give special recognition to Suzanne and Rich-Illinois for their short tenures as Acting Czars for May & June respectively. Let’s have a big round of applause and a standing ovation for all four of those fine Cycle365 patriots.
Make no mistake about it, though — there’s a new sheriff in town, and that sheriff is ME. I’ve enjoyed all of the challenges over the last three years, but it is now time to take them in a whole new goofy direction — and that’s what the Gregblood Administration intends to do. In addition to Vice-Czar Bing Bong, I’ve assembled a cabinet of highly dedicated goofballs to assist in turning the Cycle-365 Monthly Challenge into the GOOFIEST monthly challenge in the entire world.
That’s right, it’s all about goofiness. In fact, I’ve created a new slogan for my Czarist reign. Here it is: “Make America Goofy Again / Make the World Goofy Again.” [MAGA / MWGA] Whaddya think?
Who knows what kind of crazy challenges a very stable genius like me might come up with? I sure don’t. I just know they won’t be impossible to achieve. Some of them might be difficult. Some might involve straying a bit from your comfort zone. Some of them might be pretty weird, but then, weirdness is nothing to you folks. I’ve seen displays of weirdness from each and every one of you, and I mean that as a sincere compliment. Of course, some of you are weirder than others (cough Grumbleface cough) but I know you’ve ALL got it in you.
In conclusion, I am pleased to see such a YUGE crowd of enthusiastic supporters here today. You folks officially make up the yugest crowd EVER to attend the inauguration of a newly-elected Monthly Challenge Czar in history. And that, my friends is NOT an alternative fact.
I’ll be back in a couple of days with the first of my challenges. Good luck to all of you, and may the God of the Great Outdoors bless you and the entire goofy world. AMEN!